May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
