please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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