his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
