i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
