why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Randomize
