make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
