I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
