It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
