Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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