He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Randomize
