oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
