What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
