I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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