The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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