When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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