I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
