Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
