we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Randomize
