doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I just want nice things and good sex
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
