My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
