I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Randomize
