No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
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