Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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