Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
operation harelip BJ is a go
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
