you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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