Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(904): View more from Florida

I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.

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(720): View more from Colorado

You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.

Fav 90 2152 13335
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(250): View more from British Columbia

In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.

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(216): View more from Ohio

He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping

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(716): View more from New York

it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.

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(469): View more from Texas

I can feel my moral fiber fraying.

Fav 2 1606 880
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(315): View more from New York

I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.

Fav 7 830 655
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night

Fav 2 342 225
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(410): View more from Maryland

she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"

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