I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
