That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
should my penis look like a turkey
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize