weddingsv make me drug and hornr
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
