Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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