genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
