I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
