so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
