Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
