lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
The Olympian is in my bed
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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