I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize
