That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
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