Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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