can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Randomize
