i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
