R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
