White coat. Heels.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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