i just wanna soil my oats bro
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
