watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
