Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
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