You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Randomize