great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
