I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
