dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
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