you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize